| Speaker | Dialogue |
|---|
| Opening |
|---|
|
Garbled speaking and knocks, getting louder as the camera zooms in on the door with the Horrible Beast. The screen flashes to a white screen with the word 'CATGHOST' with each knock. |
|
The screen flashes to white. |
| Outside |
|---|
| NAARAH |
[Smacking into Gideon repeatedly] Knock knock, Gideon! |
| GIDEON |
You know, there's probably a much friendlier way of getting my attention than beating on my face. |
| ELON |
Answer the door, Gideon. Knock knock. |
| GIDEON |
[Looking around] I'm confused, is there like, a door around here or something? |
| NAARAH |
Ugh, its a joke, Gideon. Just say 'who's there?' |
| GIDEON |
But, why? |
| NAARAH |
[Demonic voice] JUST DO IT! |
| GIDEON |
[Fearfully] Uh, um, uh, w-who's there? |
| ELON |
Howie. |
| GIDEON |
Oh, jeez, dum dee - |
|
Naarah holds up a sign that says 'Howie Who' in Theban. |
| GIDEON |
[Reading sign] Howie...who? |
| ELON |
Howie... gonna get this door unlocked? |
|
Elon and Naarah laugh at their joke. |
| GIDEON |
I don't get the joke. |
| NAARAH |
[Angrily] you WHAT? |
|
Elon and Naarah's eyes begin to glow red. |
| ELON |
Do you even know how long it took me to write that joke? |
| NAARAH |
How could you not think that joke was funny? |
| ELON |
[Demonic voice] I slaved away for weeks coming up with the perfect punchline - |
| NAARAH |
[Demonic voice] And you didn't even laugh! |
| ELON |
[Demonic voice] Well, if you think you can make something funnier- |
| NAARAH |
[Demonic voice] Then make your own joke! |
|
Elon and Naarah glow white and the screen glitches. |
| Gideon's Cell |
|---|
|
Gideon is alone in an empty cell next to a pile of papers. |
| GIDEON |
Wow, that escalated quickly. Alright, let's see what they got here. |
|
Gideon reads the note on top of the pile. |
| GIDEON |
Hello Gideon, if you are reading this, you more than likely didn't get our joke, and have been... banished to suffer the same fate as us. You will be trapped here until you can write the greatest and best joke ever told. When you are ready, please slide your joke into the mouth of the Horrible Beast. |
| GIDEON |
Alright, let's see. |
| GIDEON |
[While writing] Knock knock. Who's there? Gideon. Gideon who? Gideon Phillips, that's me. Alright, good job me, I did it, let's do this. |
|
Gideon slides the joke into the mouth of the Horrible Beast. The Horrible Beast's eyes glow red and it incinerates the joke. |
| GIDEON |
Whoa, geez, okay, I guess that didn't work, let's try again. |
| GIDEON |
[While writing] Knock knock. Uh... who's at the door? No, I don't understand this, how do you write good jokes? I don't even understand how jokes are supposed to work. Alright, keep calm Gideon, you can do this thing, you just gotta think. Think! |
|
Text reading '2 YEARS LATER' appears onscreen. |
| 2 Years Later |
|---|
|
Gideon sits in the middle of his cell, paper strewn around him. He appears to have grown stubble. |
| GIDEON |
Ugh, okay, alright, this has got to be the one! This is it, I've got it! Okay... |
|
Gideon slides the joke into the mouth of the Horrible Beast. The Horrible Beast's eyes glow red and it incinerates the joke. |
| GIDEON |
Ugh, what do you want from me? I have been here for nearly two years trying to figure this thing out! I've tried clever anecdotes, smart phrases, celebrity inserts... I don't know what else to do! I don't understand... I need to get through that door. I need to- wait a minute! |
| GIDEON |
[While writing] Knock knock. Who's there? Anita. Anita who? Anita get through this door! |
|
Gideon slides the joke into the mouth of the Horrible Beast. The Horrible Beast's eyes glow green and a bell tolls. |
| GIDEON |
Yes! I did it! Take that you stupid weird-faced thing! I've done it! I've written the funniest knock knock joke in- |
|
[Gideon looks at the door] What the... |
|
The Horrible Beast's mouth begins to open wider and Gideon's eyes grow wide as he is hypnotized. Static begins to fill the screen and the Horrible Beast's mouth continues to open wider. Various images flash onto the screen. |
| Outside |
|---|
|
The camera cuts to a view of the Horrible Beast in a normal state on a door outside. Gideon is staring at it with wide eyes. Elon and Naarah are with him. |
| NAARAH |
Uh, he's been staring at that door a really long time... |
| ELON |
Uh, do you think we should call for help? |
| NAARAH |
Nah, let's poke him with a stick! |
| ELON |
That could be fun... |
|
Credits roll. |